BEST INSHA: CENTRAL PROVINCE KCPE 2011

BEST INSHA: CENTRAL PROVINCE KCPE 2011

Care Of a forwarded email..and it made my day, so i thot id share it wid you.:)

Turikuwa tumerara for for for. Tukasikia mayowe kwa jilani..wuuuuui… wuuui.. wuuuu…, Kusikia mayowe kwa jilani kwanza nikarenga!!!..Kusikia wuuuui tena nikaona nisi assume kwani wahenga wahenguzi hawakujifunga kiremba cha mbwaa koko waliposema mbiuu ya mgabo ikiria kuna jabo. Nikashuka kitadani kwa mwedo wa hajikwaiiii. Nakwambia kufungua mlango hivi tu nusra nipige ukemi!!, kurikuwa na giza mingi, imejaa kila mahari.Nikasikia uwoga ukipita kwa tubo, harafu roho yangu inagonga mbu! mbu! mbu! Usitake njua vile nilikuwa nimemaka kama kibogoyo ameota akikula mifupa. Nikatembeaa aste aste nikiwaza kinaga ubaga kuerekea kure masauti za mayowe zilikotoka. Nilikuwa nikijaribu kama naweza pata mawe kwa balabala, lakini hiyo balabala ya kwetu hainanga mawe kumbwa kumbwa ni kokoto tu, kwa hivyo nikatoa kiatu nikitumie kama mawe. Nilipokuwa nikitembea nikasikia jogoo amewika kurukuku kuuuuu!!Nikashangaa Abadan katan kwanini amewika mapema hivyo lakini nikakumbuka chambilecho wahenga jogoo wa taoni hawiki ushago. Nikajua huyo jogoo lazima awe anakaa kwa mpaka ya mashambani na mjini, ndiposa hakujua masaa ya kuwika. Nikataka kumwambia huyo jogoo anyamaze lakini nikaona niwache kama walivyo nena waredi hayanihusu ndewe wala sikio ama shingo. Tuendelee na stori ya wezi. Sasa kutembea hivyo hivyo nikaona umati wa watu ukierekea mboma Fulani hapo kwa neiba wetu wamembemba mapanga, ma mawe na makamba. Nikawafuata, kuenda huko nikapigwa na butwa, lakini sikumupiga mimi kwa sababu ya kumuogopa. Kuangalia nje ya ile mboma hapo napo nikapigwa na hamaki,,wololo, palikuwa na kijana wa miraba mine na mwingine mwenya mramba mnusu!!Kijana huyu wa miramba mine alipigwa ngumi na kijana barobaro, jambo hilo linifurahisha nikacheka kwe kwe kwe na bashasha ribo ribo ribo.Kupigwa ngumi alitoka ndamu kwa mapua pole pole mpaka nikaamini ndamu ni nzito kuliko manji. Kando kurikuwa na wamama wanapiga nduru, Kuulizia ni nini kinaendelea ati niwakora wanapigwa.. Nikasikia nimemboeka sana kwani nilidhania ni wezi warikuwa wamekunja kumbe ni wakora…Kwa hivyo nikakubaliana na wahenga wahenguzi na nyakanga ukistanjambia ya Mutha utaona ya firauni,,,kwani nilidhani ni wezi kijijini walipigiwa nduru kumbe ni wakora. Nikirundi nyumbani nikaenda nikumbuka kwamba kila kilicho na mwanzo hakina mwisho..!!

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120 Responses to BEST INSHA: CENTRAL PROVINCE KCPE 2011

  1. my ribs are achin…………………..this is mo than a joke

  2. Kaume jack says:

    Wakikuyu nao

  3. Miru Maycie says:

    Tht candidate cannot b serious

  4. Ihuoma sassy viola says:

    Ma ribs r aching bg tym….waah am luvn dis

  5. Mose says:

    Noma sana!

  6. tambo macharia says:

    my lecturer almost chased me from class!!!

  7. mas hotezo says:

    Hahahaha……chabirecho wahenga mucheka sana huvunjika mbavu

  8. LMAO ! I couldn’t stop laughing all the way to the end.Thanks for sharing.

  9. mwabili says:

    And thats where the best candidates emerge from, not withstanding.

  10. bishar says:

    athari ya mazingira ndiyo hiyo

  11. Roz Rhouzie says:

    This made my day! lol
    Nilipokuwa nikitembea nikasikia jogoo amewika kurukuku kuuuuu!!

  12. cecilia njeri says:

    ruin of the dem year 2011 hahahaa!

  13. Edward says:

    what a writing…..that comedian of a candidate is really one of the greatest arts i have so far come across…MY RIBS,LOL
    EST!!!

  14. britt0000 says:

    hahahahahahahahahaha

  15. lefix says:

    i jst got a six pack from reading this

  16. lenny man chelsea says:

    You have made up ma day thks

  17. Abdazino says:

    this is, one best inshas i hav ever read…lolz. U made ma day.

  18. Christine says:

    LOL double LOL

  19. timoh beres says:

    wawawawawa,,maze,,kama ni mimi ningetoka bio,,

  20. Haha, Dean Neady, haha haha

  21. Kimz says:

    Hiro insha alikopia yangu.

  22. Wilson Naviava Kidiavai says:

    A reflection of our society and education. You can be sure this is how the candidate has been writing for the last 8-10 years before finally seating the final exam. Makubwa haya.

  23. patto says:

    Hiyo kali!!!!

  24. Simon Kagotho says:

    Av never laughed like this in a looong time, thanks admin.

  25. Caroline says:

    Hehe,nimesheka nikashoka

  26. nerves says:

    Haki enyewe wakikuyu nao

  27. Bilha says:

    haha it so funny ,, bt i bliv ,sm of us, one time we were there, en esp if you were brought up in reserve schools en de only language one knew was mother language en teachers who also spk de same, so i cnt blame him/her,

  28. Anthony says:

    wah, leaders of tomorrow, then there is no tomorrow. This worth a comedy not an insha

  29. this is career comic of the century, can’t stop laughing.

  30. Lucie says:

    Criously crazy!!

  31. Glad glado says:

    Hehe. Asukumiwe dalizu. Am saying nthn more!

  32. i cnt blv, this must b the joke of the year 2011. a whole candidate…ngai mwathani!

  33. Natasha says:

    O.M.G. my ribs are killing me am in tears already.waaarr whoever wrote it.Congrats..

  34. Toby Wanyeki says:

    Ngai Fafa!.. Lmfao!

  35. Ng'ash says:

    umetuwahi mbaya…… karí kìì???????

  36. David lugose says:

    Aye.!iyo ni kali, si wezi ni wakora.

  37. Evans natili wanyonyi says:

    Made my nyte

  38. carol kibui says:

    Kiuks Kiuks. Hamna bahati. hahahaha.

  39. ANNE NAKHUMICHA says:

    they shd come for tips in western. it has made my day.

  40. Elud githae says:

    40/40

  41. Willow scott says:

    Central ,!!! Central,!?? Poor findings

  42. montizzle says:

    hahahaha ati “tuendelee na story ya wezi” killer punchline

  43. Q says:

    Lol.this is just crazy!

  44. ken says:

    i hope this is for laugh only

  45. phyllis says:

    Interesting… I am laughing loudly and am at work

  46. sam says:

    He seemed to have an idea..only how to lay it down seemed to be a problem

  47. pkenneth says:

    Warai birai,kama ni ngerudi Njenga nrimary School ninge copy paste this one nione ama Mrs Matiru (Wamatu ) angenisahihishia nipate arama ishilini kwa thirty sababu hii ni kari na ni creativity.

  48. debby says:

    huyo candidate i think ni wa kwetu,not very bad,still on track

  49. Japonj says:

    ha ha ha dis is da best insha ever…

  50. joeytales says:

    waaaah!!!! too funny!! this post will get me fired! kid actually has a sense of humor. “palikuwa na kijana wa miraba mine na mwingine mwenya mramba mnusu!” dead and buried.

  51. inshaabove says:

    this is tongue twisting not insha

  52. john says:

    Hii incha ina makocha mengi.Kwanza angaria shingo instead of chingo,sikio ni chikio na mwicho kure anapomalizia nikakubuka kilisho na mwanzo hakina mwicho

  53. oyeyo says:

    Wala Bin Wala c anawaspoil hao watoi.hiyo ni naswa

  54. Julie Towett says:

    ha ha , then try google translate! hilarious!

  55. wamwish says:

    bwahahahahahahahahhahaaahahahah

  56. musiomi says:

    this is the most inteligent candidate i have ever seen. kama ningekuwa mwalimu ningemnukulia alama si haba alikolelewa na kufunzwa ndipo kuna shida lakini yeye mwenyewe ni mwingi wa mawazo?!

  57. Jared okong'o says:

    Dis is lack of /l/. N-way. Not so bad 4a std8 from central. Tsc shld post kisw trs frm da coast here.

  58. Shiku presh rispah says:

    Acheni ku2onea yawa!mnafikilia ha2chui kuadika giswahiri bana!

  59. kisanya geoffrey says:

    haa! haaa! haaa! haaaaaaaaaaaaa!…….

  60. Christine says:

    Gosh this is too funny…its only for people who can really get a joke…..tokkk almost an hour to finish reading coz of the laughter. I hope the creator can give us more.

  61. jamie ngash says:

    wat a joke

  62. sams says:

    hehehhehehe heeell no damn we kiuks tuna shidaa wht…..thiz is a killa laughta joke….mo tha a joke,mi loving thiz,cnt stop chekain heheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

  63. Kefa says:

    Jus med my mrng!!

  64. Carol says:

    hio insha ni poa. hata story enyewe ilifurahisha mwenye alimark hata hangeona errors…………. i wld like to read one from nyanza oh!

  65. levis kayian says:

    washana naye

  66. kadus says:

    he is better than me. Ngai fafa!

  67. dan says:

    Gosh this is too funny this insha has made my day even the story is short
    n at least naweza taka ya luo guyz

  68. sharon says:

    sasa turudi kwa story ya mwizi, Ooh! si mwizi ni mkora, this just made my day, if only i can get a kissii and a luo insha like this…

  69. Francis otieno says:

    Madnes

  70. wawawawah! sijawahi toa machozi mob juu ya kucheka kama leo. naumwa na mbavu. churchill live kando.

  71. Joram says:

    Da tichas mst be also klzy.cant stop laughing.uve made ma nyte

  72. Joram says:

    Ma odijo mast be also be clazy.dis is so amazin n so creative

  73. DeAndre George says:

    if this is 1 of the best insha in CENTRAL….the worst reads aje…i cn only imagine

  74. Joseph maina says:

    Eti huyo jogoo alikuwa anapark kwa boarder kwani ni wa JAGUAR.

  75. brayern says:

    crazy insha that is!! qltm

  76. John Titus says:

    Its better than from the lakeside!

  77. Victor says:

    u’ve made ma dei. Kiswahil kina wenyewe

  78. Bernad says:

    Sisemi kitu! Its gud! It has made ma day!

  79. lilian says:

    wa! its rib cracking this insha!

  80. john chege says:

    …atlist kuna methali kibao, he deserves a 10/40, ni mchechi…

  81. Mghosi M'baha says:

    La! Haula! Kijana amejaribu, japo si insha tena ila ni “incha”

  82. joram says:

    surely………..

  83. gigi says:

    Swaleh Mdoe should read this!!

  84. Dan says:

    Infact nimelaugh sana. That’s kikuyu.mbalambala,mamawe kukuru kukuu.

  85. John says:

    How many marks n who was tha tcha

  86. jeff says:

    Hilarious hahahaha men u made my day

  87. Karanja says:

    Wuuuiiii huyo mtoto wa nani. Ama this are the results u free primary education….

  88. ochi texy says:

    mambo bad, must be mbonoko’s bro ‘sufara wa mungu’

  89. mikimiki says:

    wawawaawawawawawawa man siiiiiiiiiiiicccccckkk

  90. Sharon says:

    Jeez……… Kwisha maneno.,

  91. lorac says:

    wah! one of the greatest comedians to be.

  92. kiiru says:

    mambo bad

  93. Bogie says:

    ujinga ni kama huu.

  94. Regina says:

    Tht candidate is amazn…usn methali wthout knowin its purpose

  95. alex says:

    Haki nusra bin vu karibu hata mimi nikuwe dani yao sababu walikuwa wamewekelewa BONOKO. sasa mimi kufika hapo nikawabia mama sina wasasi mama ni chokora baba pia ni chokora. sasa hata mimi narara kwa makorido danidani kwa strit .nikapigwo teke huku nyuma yagu kweda kabixa fara wewe .nikathani wanasema kifaru ya Alshabaab.story yagu inaishia hapo.

  96. Emmanuel mutuku says:

    Such insha’s can only be found at Nyamakiminja ACADEMY.

  97. Paul mo says:

    Huyo mwanafunji ana chinda ya matamchi!

  98. Hillary says:

    Pwe! Pwe! A big tune….noooma xanaaa!!!

  99. Lunyah. says:

    Huyo mwanafunzi anaweza kufanya vyema akifunzwa namna ya kutumia misemo,methali,misamiati,na minyambuliko ya vitenzi.dnt lose hpe.

  100. Ayub says:

    hahaha uiiiiiiiii you made my evening i would like to meet the writer in person and give an Oscar Award.

  101. jessica says:

    jeez even a class one can write a better insha

  102. Kerio says:

    Ths s a laugh episode

  103. Kerio says:

    Ths s interesting insha

  104. DAVID JALENGA says:

    God must be saying OH MYSELF

  105. Mr Karanja says:

    Nice indeed joke cracker.

  106. Bonny says:

    Made in Kenya.

  107. Symo says:

    Lol! My ribs are aching.dah.

  108. Carol says:

    Mad my day

  109. Jaymo says:

    hahaha such a nyce insha from my bro…. na siringi!!!!!!!!!

  110. Ronald mwakisima says:

    What a fantastic insha.arie andika hongela

  111. Urbanus says:

    Iyo ni njega

  112. Sammy says:

    Wow! You really made your swahili teacher proud didn’t ya

  113. Ashton says:

    DIO! USICHAGAE FIRE WAKIKUYU NI wafamburas yani wa amaising yani waklietif vihilalious! Ni TARANTA! yane ne jini (genes)!!

  114. lyna says:

    lol……..i still cant stop laughing esp that part wahenga, wahenguzi na nyakanga

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